To scheme or not to scheme?

Any singleton approaching the terrifying 30 can identify with the horror of facing their friends and parents at any social event, especially at weddings. The blatant queries from aunties that they are waiting to drink your sodas (at your wedding!!) and your mum’s subtle questions on who you are dating is enough to drive any single to the lonely hearts column. Every singleton above 25 entertaining the thoughts of marriage and children has experienced the disappointment of non committal relationships. My decision to write this article is to express my thoughts on living single. Yes, am a sigh away from the big 3-0 and as single as they come!
The other day I and some girls started a small discussion over coffee which escalated into a full press conference on the quandary that has befallen us... the quandary being our ‘singleness’. Rish reached for a napkin which we quickly used as a paper and drew up a checklist of all our pals who are married, I won’t say happily just married and the rest of us still single. The question on our minds was what did they do different? In the heated exchanges the word ‘scheme’ popped up. Some of us said ‘scheme’ sounded devious but after a few examples we all conceded that there was no better way to put it.
Take Gacheeri for instance; back in college she used to be an assertive woman and could very easily incite crowds to boycott class. She was also in a relationship with a guy called Mbuthia. I remember weekends of Gacheeri going to Mbuthia’s to wash clothes, cook and perform all the wifely duties and she would turn into this meek girl who wouldn’t argue with anyone in his presence. Soon after college she got married in a colourful ceremony to her one and only… yes you guessed right; Mbuthia. Gacheeri being in my class was constantly complaining of catching him with girls but always forgave him. I will not speak of what happened after the wedding but I can bet that Mbuthia met the true Gacheeri. Conversely, I remember Atieno; she was going out with Ochi but refused to ‘act wifely’ for lack of a better description. She always asked why she was required to have his house key and go over to wash his clothes whilst her clothes would remain untouched still waiting for her. Needless to say, Atieno was seated on my right during the debate…. Still single.
This will sound incredulous but I have been given suggestions by my married pals that vary from acting stupid when he goofs to turning a blind eye when you suspect that he’s dogging! I find it hard to imagine that ladies can turn a blind eye especially when you have a gut feeling that something is amiss. Is this not deception? Why should I feign ignorance of his misgivings just so that I don’t rock the boat? Oh, I’m supposed to play dumb all in the hopes that a proposal is in the not to distant future!! One close friend of mine put on this grave look and said to me “you should cook him peas like they are going out of fashion!” and further pronounced “A woman is called one because of her endurance!”
There are times when I think that going on with such counsel would definitely get me a husband but the question is, what about after we get married and my true nature is brought to the fore? Men are always complaining that the woman they dated and the wife she turned out to be are two different people. Thus I put forward my question to you… to scheme or not to scheme?